I know there are plenty of Underworld readers who enjoy posts about vintage TV, beloved actresses, character actors and other assorted subjects here, but by far the topic that really draws people into the whirlpool of this website is that of beefcake, be it bare chests, Speedos or bulges. So, to celebrate the season of decorated eggs, I give you a selection of famous baskets to peer at. Just look at the basket Robert Urich of
Vega$ (1978-1981) is putting forth! I apologize in advance that this is rather random and all over the place, but I cull these from a wide variety of places! Most of these will look better if you open in a new tab/window.
We'll start way back in the late-'20s/early-'30s with this shot of Czech actor Francis Lederer keeping in shape on a studio lot. The photo, most likely taken for use in publicity or in fan magazines, shows him in great shape, especially for this era.
'30s and '40s superstar
Errol Flynn is shown here relaxing on his boat, the Zaca.
This next set of shots is of ruggedly handsome 1950s star Richard Egan.
While they don't reveal a lot, I liked them too much to omit them from today's celebration!
Dead-gorgeous bodybuilder Ed Fury during an appearance on
My Little Margie.
Leave it to Beaver's adorable Tony Dow.
Here's Underworld favorite
George Nader doing some brick-laying (dresses in his work clothes and “dressed right!”)
On his 1958-1960 TV series,
The Texan, Rory Calhoun occasionally allowed us to see where he kept his other “gun.”
Not always picky about where it hung, it often switched sides depending on his mood.
The Texan guest star Ron Hayes displayed some VPL in this 1959 episode.
Singing teen-idol
Fabian wore some figure-flattering pants in 1959's
Hound Dog Man.
Starting in 1959,
Bonanza hit the airwaves where it (rather amazingly) stayed until 1973. Bulge King
Michael Landon kept keen viewers alert for the run of the show. This particular picture doesn't say a thousand words, but others of him sprinkled into previous posts sure do!
Do you get your kicks from
Route 66 (1960-1964)? If so, you will enjoy this shot of George Maharis in some fun pants.
Here, we see the lovely
Tab Hunter in his prime during the movie
The Golden Arrow (1962.)
The golden one wasn't the only arrow pointing in a given direction during the movie!
Mr. Burt Reynolds, hanging out in the kitchen of one of his early homes.
When
Hugh O'Brian guest-starred on the premiere episode of
The Virginian (1962), he wore some weathered jeans that sometimes gave our eyes a treat. (If you happened to look at the woman, that's Miss Colleen Dewhurst as his ladyfriend.)
Bulges and VPL in moving images can be so hard to capture, but you get the basic idea...
Regular stars of
The Virginian Gary Clarke and Doug McClure frequently offered up some old west bulgery.
Bonuses like this can really help one make it through the more subdued moments of a vintage television episode.
The humpy Mr. Paul Newman in his
Hud (1963) guise.
Barry Morse, who spent all those years pursuing
The Fugitive (1963-1967) had a lot going on downstairs. This was demonstrated even further later when he was on
Space: 1999, but here we see a preview of the future...
Unquestionably, my favorite workout duo (there have been more than a few pictures of them exercising together while at Warner Brothers), delectable Van Williams and Robert Conrad!
The western TV series
Laredo (1965-1967) had the benefit of a couple of hunks who sometimes showed off their stuff.
Peter Brown and William Smith had great camaraderie and wore some clingy trousers.
Here, they (especially Smith on the right) pitch a couple of tents while being held hostage and staked to the ground!
Stephen Boyd is constricted in his tight, white wetsuit, but I love him and the movie
Fantastic Voyage (1966) so I am posting the picture anyway.
One of my favorite parts of the 1969 sci-fi classic
2001: A Space Odyssey is this sequence that shows the astronauts passing their time through exercise and other activities.
The camera gives us a welcome glimpse of the inside of Gary Lockwood's legs as he runs along a large wheel.
Though the actors are almost secondary to the visuals of this movie, this is still one of Lockwood's finest hours.
Likewise, I love when he sprawls out in his boxer shorts for a dose of Vitamin D.
You can't make out a whole lot from this picture of
John Gavin from the 1970 TV-movie
Cutter's Trail, but he's so dang good looking I had to allow it in this collection.
Leather fans rejoice, for here is Robert Culp (of
I Spy and
The Greatest American Hero fame) in a clingy two-piece get-up.
In 1971's disturbingly brutal
A Clockwork Orange, Malcolm McDowell has a scene in just a pair of skimpy briefs.
He parades around in them before a local police detective...
...and the detective gets rather physical with him, in a homoerotic moment.
The TV series
Emergency! (1972-1979), with its paramedics in navy uniforms, wasn't an easy place to spot bulges, but sometimes when the rescuers were in street clothes it got a little easier. This guy on a far left is pressed into his striped trousers.
More prominent is the moose-knuckle supplied by Tim Donnelly in this early episode.
Teen idol (of
All My Children and
Battestar Galactica fame) Richard Hatch gives good bulge in this publicity portrait.
It's back to hunky
Robert Conrad for this revealing photo taken on the set of his WWII series
Baa Baa Black Sheep (1976-1978.)
In 1977's
Equus, Peter Firth left nothing at all to the imagination during his lengthy nude scenes, but we got a coming attraction early in the movie when he showed up in Richard Burton's office in these revealing pants.
Also in 1977, John Wayne's handsome son Patrick starred in
Sinbad and the Eye of the Tiger, with pants that occasionally afforded a glimpse of Pat Jr.
Something seems to be stirring in this picture of Jan Michael Vincent taken during the making of
Hooper (1978.)
And bulges need not be mentioned without a nod to
The Dukes of Hazzard (1979-1985), so we give you John Schneider in some tight jeans.
In 1980, Dallas' Patrick Duffy guest-starred in a two-part installment of
Charlie's Angels and, for whatever reason, happened to show more bulge that he usually did on his own show.
Those late-'70s polyester pants could sometimes become very telling.
Science-fiction has almost always been one of the most fertile places to find bulges and 1979's
Star Trek: The Motion Picture is no exception. Certain types of the unisex-style uniforms in the movie leave little to the imagination.
The mere act of raising one's arms to change a light bulb (or whatever this dress extra is doing!)...
...caused the uniforms to cling tightly in the crotch area.
When he was finished, the uniform was still gathered up into his nether regions! This is one reason I was disappointed when the overhauled all the clothes for subsequent films in the series.
It took a person of a certain level of personal security to pull this look off. The film's costar Stephen Collins had to deliver a series of serious lines with his penis head at 1:00!
He was very pretty in his day, though, wasn't he?
Lately, I've been coming across photos of Gerald McRaney and Jameson Parker of
Simon & Simon (1981-1989), a long-running show that I never watched. McRaney favored tight jeans while Parker leaned towards khakis.
In this shot, you can get an idea of why Delta Burke hasn't done much complaining since her marriage to McRaney! Ha!
Look at deliriously beautiful
Ted McGinley of
Happy Days (1980-1984, and later
The Love Boat and
Dynasty.)
C. Thomas Howell was only one of several young stars to get a big career boost with the 1983 film
The Outsiders. Here, he's wearing some skimpy jockey shorts.
In 1987, tight jeans were still the rage for a lot of guys and few were as tight as Robert Krantz's in the dirt-bike racing flick
Winner Takes All.
It's enough to make you wonder how any of us walked or sat!
Also in 1987, Tim Daly (Tyne little brother) worked on the film
Made in Heaven, part of which was set in 1952, hence the retro looking (and thankfully tight) clothes.
I will leave you with a shot of one of TV's most eye-opening performers, Fred Dryer of
Hunter (1984-1991), whose jeans on the show should have been rated PG-13 or R! In fact, he was steered into dress slacks for much of the time by fretful execs. I wish you all a very Happy Easter (even though many of you may not even celebrate it!) and hope that you are faced with fun baskets of your own!
