Tuesday, April 27, 2021

Bumps in the Road - Group III

This is my latest mound of bulge pics, gathered during decompression TV & movie viewing during the pandemic. After this, I'm going to attempt to get back to some sort of regular posting, even if they are brief ones as I was doing for a while. This is a quite varied collection, so I suspect there ought to be something for just about everyone! Above left is Mr. Rock Hudson in the film Pretty Maids All in a Row (1971.) Even though Hudson is constantly getting it on with a parade of sexy coeds in the movie, in real life he was reportedly involved with his young male costar John David Carson (seen with him here.)

Hudson allegedly got into the sexy spirit of the swinging murder mystery by doing without any underwear during the filming.

One of the old reliables when it comes to vintage VPL is Mr. Steve Cockring Cochran. The always-sexy actor is seen here in the western Raton Pass (1951.)

A master at menacing gazes, he also had a tendency to reveal what was going on in his pants if they were of the right fit & fabric.

The star of the movie was Patricia Neal, who he manages to entice away from leading man Dennis Morgan.


That's not Morgan, but another costar Scott Forbes at left (if you can even manage to look that direction...!)

Another old hand at allowing a sneak peak of his third leg was Rory Calhoun. This movie, Ride Out for Revenge (1957) boasted a cast of familiar faces such as Lloyd Bridges, Gloria Grahame and Vince Edwards.




The handsome devil seen here is William Smith, a bodybuilding actor who worked in many TV shows and movies. This was Laredo, on which he was a regular.





Thanks to loyal reader and fellow blogger Angelman66, we were able to get a glimpse of that fabled stage production of "Fortune and Men's Eyes." The play was spicily revised by Sal Mineo, who directed in it and starred alongside protegee Don Johnson. While not all of it was preserved on film, there is a nice chunk of it available for viewing.


Newcomer Johnson moved in with Mineo during this period so their on-stage chemistry was rather significant. Sadly, the most eye-popping moments of the play are not captured on film...
...but we do get some bulgy moments from young Johnson in his flimsy briefs.

The scene shown here is from the western series The High Chaparral. A boxer is taking on all comers as a prelude to a big fight that's coming up.

George Sims, who is sporting a pre-Tom Selleck stache, plays the strapping boxer.



Methinks we may have lost something when we segued into satin shorts with a stripe down the side. I'd be more interested if boxers wore tights again. Ha ha!

The gents seen here are Sid Haig and Jerry Franks. They appear in 1971's female prison flick The Big Doll House as (horny) food suppliers. They wind up getting more than they bargained for, though, when some of the gals escape.

They are stripped of their clothing so that the escaped prisoners can use it to disguise themselves.

This leaves Franks and Haig in only their tightie-whities.

They ask for and are granted permission to go to the bathroom and are shown on their walk back to the truck.





Haig, at far right, had a long, prolific career as a bad guy in movies and on TV, but this was Franks' only significant film appearance. He had appeared on several episodes of The Jonathan Winters Show in various sketches.

I'm afraid I didn't catch this hapless fellow's name when I watched 1981's Final Exam, about a psycho stalking a college campus. (But I can tell you it is not Martin Short in his SNL skit about synchronized swimming! LOL) As a new pledge to a fraternity, he is (somewhat homoerotically) hazed by some of the brothers.

He is taken outside and stripped to his undies...


Next, he's tied to a tree, covered in shaving cream, sprayed with a fire extinguisher (!)...

...doused with ice water...

...and then has the remaining ice dumped into his briefs!

Shrinkage Alert!


The poor chap is then left there until nightfall.

Fortunately, a night watchman passes by and is able to cut him loose.


I'm not sure the danger is over, though.

You may remember Jared Martin, who made a bit of a splash as Dusty Farlow on Dallas? He's seen here in the Italian-made sci-fi flick Rome 2033: The Fighter Centurians (1984.)

The movie has that sort of hazy look to it (to help disguise cheap sets?)

But his flimsy prison uniform still affords a bit of exposure.

The blonde cutie seen here is from Summer Job (1989), one of countless, countless '80s beach/sex comedies. Unlike many actors who do towel scenes, he really was naked underneath because he's seen slipping into some briefs during the shot.


Unfortunately for him, someone put ointment (Icy-Hot-ish stuff) in his briefs!

Later, he's shown walking along the beach with the female lead of the movie. We don't really get a proper view of his snug spandex shorts, though.

However, when he brazenly cops a feel...

...she grabs him right back - where it counts!

Sorry some of these dates are a little askew. I generally try to be chronological, but didn't quite succeed this time! The above person is one Tommy Lee Jones and the movie, one of his lesser-known efforts, is Nate and Hayes (1983.)

In the period swashbuckler, he sports some revealing pants, particularly in this walk across a city thoroughfare.



If you can manage to get past the serious wedgie on the guy to the right, there is a Jazzercize participant in the middle. The film in question is 1984's Heavenly Bodies.

Oh God, the wedgie's even worse now! The person in pink and blue is one of several athletes coerced into taking an aerobics class in order to improve balance and dexterity. He's trying to make fun of it by appearing female.

And his little get-up is pretty revealing!


Ultimately, he is interrupted by the instructor Cynthia Dale, but not before we get a pretty good look at him.

The lesser-known actor's name is Richard Rebiere.

As he soon becomes the love interest of Dale, we get to see more of him, including the big finale in this sort of Rocky meets Flashdance meets Perfect!



Did ya ever see Carrington (1995) with Emma Thompson? I finally did and one of her boyfriends (Rufus Sewell) has a fascinating swimsuit on in one scene.

According to the sundial, it's about 9:47am? LOL

Looks like we're back in prison again. This time, literally! The movie from 1987 is called Prison. Ivan Kane is being issued his clothing while wearing only these snug briefs.


Later, the whole assemblage of inmates is corralled into the courtyard and made to stand in the sun with only their underwear for protection. One of them, though, gets the upper hand.

Say, do you recognize this handsome ferret towards the right side of the pic?

Yes, it's the chiseled Viggo Mortensen at his most beautimous...!

Mortensen would go on to greater glory (and greater on-screen exposure) in the coming years. But he was pretty dreamy here. Before I go, I have a couple more pics of someone who made a bit of an impression in my last batch of photos...

Peter Wyngarde caught the eye of several readers last time. Here he is in some taut white pants during his days as Jason King.

And speaking of leaving an impression....! He's seen here after receiving Britain's Best Dressed Male Personality of 1970. "Dressed Left," I might say...! (To the right is the prior year's winner, one Barry Gibb.)

14 comments:

BryonByronWhatever said...

Anything you post is always appreciated. Many of these pics are reminders of favorite actors of the past that I too admired for things other than their acting skills.

Unknown said...

I have never seen a bad post here. Memories of a young teenager who was coming to terms with himself. Thank you.

Dean W. said...

Your posts kindly offer us tantalizing portraits of the past – presenting thoughts and images of things then-present, but overlooked, due to the repressions of their time.

Shawny said...

Click zoom click zoom!!! I didn’t start salivating until I got to William Smith.:)

A said...

Thanks again, Poseidon, another great post!

I'm a big fan of Rock Hudson and somehow I never heard of the thing with John David Carson. I'd like to see that movie.

I don't remember Rufus Sewell from the '90s. He is so handsome now, but he reads kinda creepy in these photos.

Gingerguy said...

I forgot I had a huge crush on William Smith, I used to bore holes into the tv with my eyes, he never took the place of Peter Lupus in my heart but it was close, those tights were so ugly on the boxer but not as bad as the "Heavenly Bodies" get up. I am not embaressed to have seen that one but I should be, I think I was trying to see "Perfect" couldn't find it and settled on that epic. Sometimes you're just in the mood for an aerobics movie.

Poseidon3 said...

Hello friends. Well... it's remained crazy in The Underworld. Not only am I still on the work rollercoaster, but I've had to have my second (minor) surgery in 7 months and also deal with the deterioration of a relative who was put in hospice care today. So it ain't been fun! But I appreciate you leaving your comments and reflections just the same. I've tried to keep up with releasing them from comment purgatory as much as I could.

ByronByron, that you so much! I feel sure I've had my share of dud posts over these long 11 years, but I'm glad that the better ones stand out in your mind. I'm happy that you liked this.

Unknown, again, I appreciate your comment so much! I'm so glad that my blatherings are taken so well by others. LOL I try, but - hey - nobody's perfect. Thanks!

Dean W, exactly. We are now, as a culture, rather hyper aware of bulges, exposure, context, etc... but back in the day a lot of things slid under the radar! That's why it's fun for me. It's truly (I mean this!) not about size or anything. It's about seeing something that we probably weren't intended to. (Peter Wyngarde aside. He's clearly deliberate in his exposure!) It's like mining for gems in a way. Ha ha! Thanks!

Shawny, I'm glad you liked these pictures. William Smith was SO handsome. In time, he became quite scary, though for me he always was since my very first encounter with him was in "Rich Man, Poor Man" in which he was a bad guy. "Laredo" was something I only discovered more recently. More often he was an intimidating force on TV and in movies.

A, I only found out about Rock and John David a few months ago myself. Fascinated me... I really didn't like that movie the first time I saw it, but it went down - so to speak - better the second time. As for Rufus, his character here was very selfish, petulant and determined, hence the creepy look. Thanks!!!

Gingeryguy, I LOVE that you saw "Heavenly Bodies!" That's awesome. It's such a cheesetastic movie... It could only have been made in the '80s. I loved it in spite of itself.

Polly Esther said...

Wish my phone was 3-D! Lots of tighty-whitey bulges this go-round! But my fave was another actor you have exposed to me, so to speak! One Steve Cochran! I think Patricia may have Kneeled for that one... nice bulge pics!
And lil Don Johnson looks so young and tender in those pics. Chicken Delight!
Thanks for sending joy to us; it will come back around to you! Hang in there

rigs-in-gear said...

Like so many of your posts, this one really speaks to me. Plus, the old b&w movie stills give your younger readers some insight into what we boomers (please) considered erotica. I lived for those old Westerns, especially when the cowpoke in tight dungarees came in from the dusty trail and needed a bath in one of those galvanized wash-tubs. Thanks for all you do.

Poseidon3 said...

Polly, HILARIOUS about Patricia "Kneel!" Love the description of Don, too. I'm surprised you didn't reference Don's "Johnson!" LOL For me, it was those LIPS that stood out. So distinctive. Take care and thanks!

rigs-in-gear, I always love the bathtub scenes. When a western cuts from a rugged trail ride and the leading man refers to needing a bath and a shave, but the movie cuts to the "after" right away, I feel dejected! LOL We need to SEE this stuff, people....!! I love the bath tub sequence in "Forty Guns." The whole movie could have taken place there for all I cared.... Ha ha!

https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-xA76-KgGUas/UMIXczcyrSI/AAAAAAAAYLk/wlh4KvZ6gpg/s1600/Tub08d.jpg

John said...

Lol this isn't a post about bulges. It's about different types of fly on men's underwear! The Y-front type worn by Don Johnson would be my own preference but I would like to try the type worn by Sid Haig.
Sorry.

Balternaut said...

What are some of the better 80s beach movies that give us ample skin from the male stars?

Scott said...

Love your posts, hope things get better for you soon.

angelman66 said...

Woohoo, Poseidon!! Had no idea I would be stumbling into a tighty whities Shangri-La today!!! And thanks for the shout out about Don Johnson and Sal Mineo—- so happy you found it!!!
- Chris