Disastrous Dais

One of our recent purchases was a set of practically every Dean Martin Celebrity Roast, a TV special series that appeared from 1974 to 1984. First beginning as a half hour "Man of the Week" (or occasional "Woman") on the back end of Martin's long-running variety show, it eventually extended into its own one-hour format. At this point the honoree would be called the "Man of the Hour."

Actor-singer Martin would preside over a panel of invited guests who'd each take his or her turn at the mic(s) "roasting" the subject at hand with all sorts of jokes, jibes and humorous knocks, often throwing stones at Martin himself or any of the other celebrities who were on hand. Then at the end, the "honoree" would come up to the mic and throw back some of the shade that he or she was handed for the prior part of the show.

If you're a regular reader of this blog, then you know of my love of all-star casts, random stars being placed together and, of course, 1970s disaster movies. (It ain't called Poseidon's Underworld for nothin'!) Take this line-up for example.

Dean Martin in Airport.

George Kennedy of Airport.

Ernest Borgnine of The Poseidon Adventure.

Shelley Winters of The Poseidon Adventure.

Richard Roundtree of Earthquake.

Darren McGavin of Airport '77.

Telly Savalas of Beyond the Poseidon Adventure.

Alex Karras of When Time Ran Out...

Then toss in Robert Stack of Airplane!...

...and Peter Graves, also of Airplane!

That's quite a disaster assemblage. Thus, it was particularly special to watch the 1974 roast of Telly Savalas (then of the hit cop show Kojak), which contained the very same above downright galaxy of '70s disaster stars. It was so much fun to see the dais filled up with these folks who are special to me, giving me a chance to see them interacting with one another outside their respective movies.

Martin, who was just four years off of the staggering box office success Airport, looks roughly the same as his troubled pilot Vernon Demerest. Martin, who played drunk throughout his variety show, did catch a bit of guff from critics when he accepted the role of an airline pilot, but he acquitted himself pretty well in the part.

Kennedy, who played the role of cigar-chomping airplane maintenance man Joe Patroni, even received a Golden Globe nomination for his part in the movie (the award went to John Mills for Ryan's Daughter) and proceeded to play the role (with increased stretching of credibility) in Airport 1975, Airport '77 and The Concorde... Airport '79. Pairing this with his costarring role in Earthquake, Kennedy was one of the kings of 1970s disaster cinema.

Borgnine's loud, brawny police detective Mike Rogo was practically unforget- table in The Poseidon Adventure, but he also appeared in the TV-movie Fire! and later in When Time Ran Out..., all produced by that Master of Disaster Irwin Allen.

Winters was even more memorable as heroic Belle Rosen in The Poseidon Adventure, winning a Golden Globe and even scoring an Oscar nomination, though the statuette went to Eileen Heckart for Butterflies Are Free. Winters later appeared in City on Fire, a Canadian all-star disaster epic.

Roundtree was something of a rarity for the disaster genre in that there weren't very many black performers given significant parts. His motorcycle-riding daredevil Miles Quade in Earthquake is thus rather significant.

McGavin, who could be a prickly costar to work with, turned in a charming perfor- mance as engineer Stan Buchek in Airport '77. McGavin's turn at the podium was cut from the broadcast, probably for time, along with Dan Rowan & Dick Martin as well as Alex Karras.

Karras' myopic, overweight appearance on this roast is a far cry from the mustached, made-over look he brought to his later acting roles including Paul Newman's oil-drilling pal Tiny Baker in When Time Ran Out... He later enjoyed a fairly long run on the sitcom Webster with his wife Susan Clark (herself a disaster movie veteran thanks to Airport 1975 and City on Fire.)

Graves and Stack turned their ordinarily stern, staid personas (from Mission: Impossible and The Untouchables, respectively) on their ears for the wacky Airplane!  Graves, as pilot Captain Clarence Oveur, kept a straight face while basically trying to seduce a young boy passenger with such come-ons as, "Have you ever seen a grown man naked?" or "Do you like gladiator movies?" He also appeared in disaster-flavored TV projects like SST: Deathflight and The Memory of Eva Riker. Stack parodied the severe, domineering Sterling Hayden of Zero Hour in his role of Captain Rex Kramer. He was a sea captain in Irwin Allen's Adventures of the Queen and appeared in the telefilm Murder on Flight 502.

At the time of this roast, though, both gents were still known for their straight (read: often wooden) approaches to their dramatic roles. This quality made them ripe for their parts in Airplane! (the same goes triple for Mr. Leslie Nielsen.) It was nice to see them free and cutting up during this roast at a time when such a sight was pretty rare in their cases.

All of the participants (including, as shown here, Borgnine and McGavin) had his or her turn laughing, thanks in part to jokes from people like Nipsey Russell, Foster Brooks, Don Rickles, Dom DeLuise, Phyllis Diller and Rich Little, but also no doubt thanks to some freely-flowing booze!

Winters, who'd worked with Savalas on The Young Savages, The Scalp- hunters and Buona Sera, Mrs. Campbell, alluded to something more than a working relationship with the then-hot sex symbol. She'd proceed to guest star on Kojak and appear with him again in The French-Atlantic Affair (as well as popping up in the z-grade comedy Backfire!, inspired by Airplane!)

Winters, surprisingly, had never acted with Kennedy, but in 1986 they both appeared in what was a bit of a throwback to the all-star disaster genre, Chuck Norris' The Delta Force. (Don't believe me? Names like Lee Marvin, Martin Balsam, Joey Bishop, Robert Forster, Lainie Kazan, Susan Strasberg, Bo Svenson and Robert Vaughn dotted the cast list!)

When Savalas had his turn to rebut, he noted the incredible special effects on Poseidon and how hard it must have been to capture that "tub" turning over (referring to Winters, not the ship!!) Winters picked up something - perhaps ice or some sort of debris - and laughingly flung it Savalas' way.

But it was all in fun. In fact, nearly every participant wound up laying a kiss of some sort on Martin and/or Savalas right after shredding him before the live audience.

As I say, some of the panel weren't given their chance to speak in the final cut of the special. McGavin, who was there no doubt due to the detective angle of Kojak, showed up wearing his hat from Kolchak: The Night Stalker, his spooky, short-lived, but fondly remembered show.

Not sure what Karras was doing there or what he had to say when he said it. His acting career was near its start and his role in Blazing Saddles was that same year. He never worked with Savalas until 1980 when they both appeared in Alcatraz: The Whole Shocking Story. He barely appears in the final cut of this roast (and the same clip of him laughing with his hand up to his face is shown multiple times.)

Roundtree was a burgeoning star from Shaft and its sequels Shaft's Big Score! and Shaft in Africa, but an attempt to make it a TV series fell flat with it being cancelled after seven episodes. (Something he was ribbed about here.) In 1979, he would work with Savalas in the star-filled, yet rather lowbrow, adventure movie Escape to Athena.

One last tidbit, not of a disaster nature. With the detective theme that pervaded this roast, Savalas was at one point given the treatment by a famous cigar-smoking, trenchcoat-wearing investigator.

Yes, at one point he was needled by none other than Columbo! Yet, this time out, the detective wasn't played by the usual Peter Falk. Another performer slid into the part, affecting all the legendary mannerisms, gestures, movement and whatever other body language, but unfortunately not completely rending the voice in a completely convincing way.

That's because his own voice was so incredibly distinct that there was hardly any disguising it. Columbo was played by iconic disc jockey and voice-over specialist Casey Kasem! He did a great job visually enacting the part. The director of the special deliberately never zoomed in too near for a close-up shot, so this is about the best view of him. Kasem, of course, provided the voices for many animated characters and kept radio listeners in thrall for decades with his American Top 40 broadcast.