Friday, September 4, 2015

Guard These with Your Life!

Ahh, Labor Day. That's a bittersweet holiday in The Underworld because although we always go off to an annual theatre convention that weekend, it also signals the end of swimming pool season as we know it. We can never wait for Memorial Day, when the pools in this area open, and get a bit down the closer Labor Day looms. So we're perking things up a little today with some photos of lifeguards! Some are famous, a few not. (And, yes, this is your webmaster, lolling by the pool with a fun summer read... one of my faithful readers who saw this picture in an e-mail mentioned ironically that there is more than one "summer place" depicted in it!  LOL I'm taking that as a personal compliment.)

The angle of the above picture has made me feel like I've got two ham hocks for legs and since I actually pride myself on possessing legs that are amongst my best features (a limited category to be sure!), I'm showing them at another, more flattering, angle!
Here is famed funnyman Buster Keaton as a lifeguard in a silent comedy short (Coney Island, 1917?) alongside Roscoe "Fatty" Arbuckle (in female drag.)
Another legendary comic, Eddie Cantor, cuts up on the lawn in lifeguard uniform.
Out of their Tarzan and Jane drag, we find Olympian Johnny Weissmuller and Maureen O'Sullivan on the beach.
Here's another look at Weissmuller in his period swimwear.
We worship at the altar of Buster Crabbe and would almost have feigned drowning in order for him to come to the rescue!
Actor-turned Prez Ronald Reagan, nicknamed "Dutch," was an athletic youth and a lifeguard at that time.
These gents aren't famous, but how could I leave these brawny lads out of the line-up?
I'm only pretending that Gilbert Roland was a lifeguard this day, but, again, how could I leave him out? If you only know him from his later, weathered and painfully thin appearances, this portrait is a revelation.
During the making of 1920s-set Some Like It Hot (1959), Marilyn Monroe is watched over by a lifeguard in a period suit.
For many years, the lifeguards of Rehoboth Beach, Delaware have been posing for postcards. We live for the Ken doll (and G.I. Joe) looks of some of these guys. Over the years, more and more female lifeguards have joined the roster. There were only three at this time.
Back in the day, there wasn't a female guard in sight! (It's interesting to note, though, the presence of a black lifeguard in these earlier times, something that was absent for many years after.)
Look at all the tan beef (and furry before it became en vogue to shear and shave oneself to nil...)
Of course we cannot overlook the movie Lifeguard (1976), which featured a ton of Speedo-clad lifeguards engaged in an athletic competition.
The movie starred Sam Elliott and costarred Parker Stevenson, both seen here in their skimpy suits.
True, we aren't in love with their little swim caps, but we'll work around it!
I don't know if any lifeguard was ever as hunky as Mr. Elliott. You can see more shots from this movie by clicking on a previous Speedo tribute here.
Who can forget the day Princess Diana presented awards to a set of Australian lifeguards?
She seemed to be very pleased with the task at hand (and who could blame her?!)
Sometimes it's good to be the Princess...
I cannot imagine, however, meeting The Princess of Wales with white zinc oxide on my lips (or, as shown earlier above, nose...) I presume this was before they developed clear z.o.?
In the '70s and '80s, it was common for lifeguards to wear the famous Speedo, though such a thing is practically unheard of now.
Considering the subject matter, I guess I'm gonna have to feature some guys from Baywatch (1989-2001), a series I never watched, which starred David Hasselhoff.
The Hoff was cute in those early years, though, wasn't he? And for a while he was joined by Lifeguard star Parker Stevenson, though he took an early hike from the show.
Hasselhoff kept himself in terrific shape as the series wore on, but somehow he lost his easy, handsome looks and physique and became hard and severe-looking. (Is this what people find attractive? Maybe I'm just out of the loop...)
You'd never know it from this photo, but costar David Charvet is 6' tall and only 4" shorter than Hasselhoff.
Early castmate Billy Warlock.
Jason Brooks and his washboard abs.
Michael Bergin
My own personal fave from this bunch, David Chokachi.
The '80s kid in me has a hard time resisting the combination of blue eyes, blond hair and tan skin...
Surf's up!
Lastly, not from Baywatch, this is dreamy Dean Cain, more famous from Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman (1993-1997.)
Which brings us to... The End!


Gingerguy said...

First of all-nice stems Poseidon. I can't believe there was so much material in this post about scanty bathing suits. Fatty Arbuckle in drag was worth it alone. He looks like a very haughty girl-hilarious.
I do believe that Tarzan's Jane is Mia Farrow's Mother? The Lavalette boys are adorable. That town is on the Jersey Shore in my home state. I had the good luck to be nearby once when they had an annual lifeguard race in boats. All pretty gorgeous. They did this weird thing where they gave themselves wedgies with their suits. I guess so you don't slip around on the seat while rowing? it was hot and weird. I visited Coronado Island in California last year where "Some Like It Hot" filmed the beach scenes and the outside of the Hotel is exactly the same. Michael Bergin was a model once and maybe dated Carolyn Bessette Kennedy? he wrote a book about it anyway. And finally the fabulous Sam Elliot. I just saw the movie "Grandma" and he was heartbreaking in it. He usually plays cowboys but here he gave a rich performance and still looks great. Happy Labor Day.

Anonymous said...

An awesome set, thank you Poseidon !! ... My favorites are the Australian lifeguards with the Princess and of course Buster my idol !

Anonymous said...

Is that Clara Bow with Eddie Cantor?

Knuckles Girlyskirt said...

Just got back from a scorching-hot long weekend (temperature-wise that is!)...only to have the heat level raised by seeing Sam Elliot in his sexy swim suit.

Poseidon3 said...

Hello, my angels. You know I would never deliberately ignore your comments. It's been a typically nutso week. Away Fri-Mon at a theatre convention, then to a Labor Day pool party Monday night and then a ton of work to do once back. And I had the displeasure of two sudden deaths of guys my exact age within days of one another. All that and trying to get a post ready for today before another weekend hit!!

Anyway... LOL, Gingerguy, about my "stems." You were a fount of information this time around! Yes, Maureen O'Sullivan was Mia's delightful mom. When I was looking for photos to fill this post, I did see some lifeguards exhibiting that wedgie thing you speak of! At least you've helped to explain it. I will have to check out the Sam Elliott movie if I get the chance! Thanks!

roijoyeux, Thank you! I have been obsessed with Buster Crabbe ever since I saw the early serial in which he played Tarzan. Yum! His photos are sprinkled all over this site.

Armando, I almost captioned that lady as Clara Bow, but since I wasn't positive, I left it alone. She certainly appears to be Clara!!

Knuckles, you are far from alone in your appreciation of Sam Elliott. If you haven't seen him (and his jeans) in "Frogs" or him (and his butt) in "The Legacy," hop to it asap! ;-) Of course, both are highlighted on this site (the jeans and butt, I mean! LOL)