Thursday, February 26, 2015

Now That's an Under-Statement!

We're feeling quite "under"whelmed in The Underworld today. Our not too long ago tribute to Jack Scalia, former underwear model, got us thinking about that arena as well as movie stars who, in or out of a film, have been seen in their drawers. By no means is this an all-inclusive collection, just some examples I either had on hand or could get my hands on (and some of them might be ones you'd like to get your own hands on!) Our cover boy today is no less than esteemed actor Spencer Tracy from the 1936 classic comedy Libeled Lady.




Men's underwear ads often had a bizarre mix of camp and erotica. Cartoony artwork and light-hearted copy accompany a rather hunky young man in this vintage piece.
Some of the humor was intentional while some of it (along with homoerotic undertones) was not!
...cause dads and sons always hang out in their undies, inspecting one another and comparing the purpose and fit!
I was struck by the progressive, yet surreal, racial harmony depicted in this 1965 ad. Just exactly what are the circumstances of this pose?!
As times changed, the ads got much more... er... wild!
God love the '80s for all their campy squalor.
Though baseball great Jim Palmer was closely associated with Jockey brand briefs, other names occasionally got in on the deal, such as Olympian Bart Conner.

For a time, rugged-faced football star Mark Gastineau enjoyed a moment in the spotlight, but I don't know what the point of an ad like this is when you're going to cover most of him up!
This one is more demonstrative. As Jean Brodie would say, "For those who like that sort of thing, that is the thing they like."
I don't think this guy is anyone particularly famous, but when it comes to fruit of the loom, he definitely puts the banana in the basket...
Easily, pants down, this ad campaign is my favorite ever. I just love the assortment of gents standing there with their trousers dropped! Extra point for the dog.
Likewise, this one with doctors made my heart skip a beat!
Moving on now to the movies, we find famed comedian Harold Lloyd in the back of a limo with William Frawley (later of I Love Lucy fame) in Professor Beware (1938.)
The same movie finds Lloyd in his skivvies at the police station.
Comic Eddie Bracken shows off his undies and his sock garters as well in Hail the Conquering Hero from 1944.
One-time comedy partners (later acrimoniously split) Jerry Lewis and Dean Martin contend with a situation while wearing only their drawers. (In At War with the Army, 1950?)
Speaking of the army, several famous pics involving underwear were snapped when Elvis Presley reported for duty during The Korean War.
Here, we see him weighing his options, which were rather limited!
Here, he takes part in the rather rigorous physical examinations that were given during the draft.
Practically every stage of this process was captured by press photographers.
On a lighter note, we find Scott Brady, hanging around in his boxers while Alan Young irons his pants in Gentlemen Marry Brunettes (1955.)
Singer Bobby Darin is caught with his pants down in one of his early-'60s film romps.
By 1971's Carnal Knowledge, scenes of actors in their jockey shorts (or less) were common. Here, we see Jack Nicholson in the process of getting dressed.
In 1972, the nudity-filled stage revue Oh! Calcutta! was recorded on tape and released as a feature film. Here, one of the actors is found wearing women's undies.
Charlton Heston is captured on location sunning himself in his tighty-whities. (Perhaps from 1965's Major Dundee?)
This music lover is better known as actor James Dean, lounging in his own pair of white briefs.
Steve McQueen is equally casual and comfortable in his skivvies.
Robert Mitchum as seen in 1971's Going Home.
James Fox during a heated moment (in 1970's Performance?)
Moviegoers get their first good glimpse of Parker Stevenson in 1972's A Separate Peace.
Waiting through the prior 100 minutes of The Drowning Pool (1975) was made worth it for some once Paul Newman had to strip down to his boxers and swim for it!
1977's Islands in the Stream affords us a glimpse of dreamy Hart Bochner, then twenty-one, in his boxers.
Matt Dillon (of Little Darlings, 1980) was a pretty big teen heartthrob, but I must say I far preferred him later on in things like There's Something About Mary and Wild Things (both 1998.)
Richard Gere is sporting some skimpy briefs in this photo.
Viewers of the 1976 TV-movie A Matter of Wife... and Death got a bird's eye view of Rod Taylor emerging from bed!
In this failed series pilot, based on the Burt Reynolds movie Shamus (1973), Taylor's bed was actually a pool table with a mattress on it.
Comedian Richard Pryor is shown in some vivid red briefs during 1978's California Suite.


A cadaverous Roy Scheider has a scene in his skimpy black briefs during the romantic thriller Last Embrace (1979.)
We now enter the Private Resort (1985) wing. Johnny Depp, near the dawn of his career, slips out of his dotted boxer shorts in order to seduce a married lady he's had his eye on.
Costar Rob Morrow seems as if he's checking Depp out, but Johnny did wear a moleskin modesty panel on the front for this scene.
Shenanigans ensue when the woman's (Leslie Easterbrook) husband enters the room, causing Depp to scramble for his life.
Also on board this film is Andrew Clay, one year before he added "Dice" to his moniker.
The carpet in the hotel room wasn't the only thing that was wall-to-wall furry!
Clay is clearly wearing another sort of item, possibly a thong or some tiny briefs, underneath his boxers.
Not to be left out of things is Morrow, in his film debut, taking part in a New Age ritual with a girl (Hilary Shaprio) he is interested in.
As required by her, he must strip out of his clothing...
...naturally, he winds up with nothing but his turban in hand just as he's shut out of the room and the manager is coming by!
In recent years, stars have found posing in their underwear to be an almost routine affair, such as David Duchovny here.
Party of Five's (1994-2000) Scott Wolf.
Antonio Sabato Jr.
Mario Lopez (deliberately aping the "Marky Mark" Wahlberg Calvin Klein ads.)
Oscar host Neil Patrick Harris poking fun at Birdman: Or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) (2014)
Jack Black! (Just seeing how closely you were paying attention! Ha ha!)
Before we say goodbye to this topic, I like to go out on a high note, so I bring you the 1987 movie Valet Girls, which costarred the delectable blond Steve Lyon.
Here is his face, closer up.
His jerky, chauvinistic character is punished, along with his pals, by the female limo drivers. He is forced to strip, climb up on the Hollywood sign and moon the town with his ass spray-painted!
Leave it to me to be stuck in the Midwest during all this!  
THE END!

16 comments:

  1. Thank you, thank you, thank you...especially for bringing to mind the long-forgotten Mr. Gastineau...he looks mighty fine in them bikini briefs.
    I personally prefer briefs to boxers, hands down...they reveal more than they conceal.
    And Rob Morrow and Johnny Depp OUT of their undies was an added bonus! Poseidon, you rock!!

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  2. Tighty whiteys make me giggle. They're sort of diaper-esque and I still don't quite understand that panel. The vintage ads are a hoot. In the first one for Jockey briefs, is that a pickle with the cane in the little box remarking how "Cool!" the shorts are? I suppose it's an ode to "cool as a cucumber" but it looks more like Mr. Peanut's wayward and slightly creepster cousin Mr. Pickle.

    And the ad for Jockey shorts featuring the doctors from the 1990s (what is going on at the ad meetings at Jockey headquarters?) - The second doctor from right looks like he's had more than his fair share of sexual harassment suits. He's hot but that's a smarmy, smug look if I ever did see one.

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  3. Briefs, especially white briefs, are the sexiest type of underwear, and the Fruit of the Loom ad surely made my day. Thanks!

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  4. Geez...I mean the second doctor from LEFT looks smarmy.

    Put a few dudes in their underwear in front of me and my brain gets all stupid.

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  5. Gastineau. Gastineau. Gastineau.

    Lord have mercy. Now, that's a man!

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  6. Wow, Poseidons' world of under! That was a dizzying tour. Almost forgot about Gastineau, he dated Brigitte Neilson and they got matching derriere tattoos (wonder if they are still there?), also the Jockey ads with the Firemen were a BIG hit with me. They did a store appearance at Macy's near me and of course I went, thinking I'd be the only guy ogleing. I most definitely was not, including their Macy's "handler" who looked like he was going to faint.

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  7. Lordy I'm glad I was sitting down before seeing that photo of Jake Gyllenhaal. Wow.

    And I guess I will have to look for Private Resort somewhere. I was a fan of Northern Exposure, so I guess this gives me some extra exposure.

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  8. Great collection! The doctors in scrubs and various designs of undies is my favorite I think but they're all terrific. Well the Andrew Dice Clay & Jack Black I could probably live without but still for completeness sake they belong here. Thanks Poseidon!

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  9. The guy from "Oh! Calcutta!" is none other than Alan Rachins, later featured on "L.A. Law" and "Dharma & Greg". As you can see, he had hair on his head then!

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  10. I'm going to have to get me copy of Valet Girls - PRONTO! Steve Lyon was gorgeous! What ever happened to him?

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  11. Lordy! I'm feelin' a little faint right now. Would somebody be a darlin' and pass me my smellin' salts, please!

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  12. Help me, Jesus, it's been a crazy several days! So sorry to have been negligent in acknowledging your comments.

    I figured that several of you would be agog over the young Johnny Depp, Rob Morrow and handsome Mr. Steve Lyon, but you could have knocked me over with a feather when you went goo goo for Gastineau! I don't know why, but I didn't consider him someone who would be a big object of desire (but should know from experience that nearly anyone is a big hit with someone.) He'll be making some sort of return appearance around Memorial Day.

    DevilYouKnow, of course I agree about the ads. Love them all!! That's hilarious about Mr. Pickle.

    Gingerguy, why does it seem like you are everywhere and have seen everything!? I mean, you SAW the Jockey doctors in PERSON!?!? LOL

    I had totally forgotten about Gastineau and Brigitte Nielsen. I recall when she and Sly Stallone commissioned nude bronze statues of themselves for their backyard, but then split up before they were installed!! I assume she got her half?

    Scot, Steve Lyon was a major league 1980s male model. He successfuly segued into fashion photography himself and moved to Paris to pursue that back in 1999. He is also an activist for endangered wildlife. He's currently 53 years old and still in very good shape.

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  13. I am 100% certain that that is NOT Jake Gyllenhaal's body in the photo. People really seem to enjoy photoshopping his head onto other people's bodies.

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  14. I KNOW I'M IN THE MINORITY, BUT I APPRECIATE THE JACK BLACK PHOTO. SOME OF US PREFER NATURAL MASCULINITY TO RIPPED PERFECTION.

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  15. Paultoes, I have no idea how or why I let that one slip by me. I am pretty dedicated to leaving fakes off my site unless identified as such. I have removed the picture from this post. Thanks!

    Chris, I myself would always pick a guy next door type over someone all carved and cut. We all have our tastes, though these days actors are considered fat and out of shape if they don't have a discernible six-pack! Thanks.

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