Friday, February 28, 2014

Bulges You Can't Beat (...though you might want to!)

Well, here we go again with a bountiful bevy of bulges, some more revealing than others, but all real and un-manipulated. (I say this because recently a poster on another site linked to mine said that they were “forced” and “fake.” Trust me, children... I painstakingly observe – it's a tough job, but someone's got to do it! - every photo of this type, trying always to get the best example I can, and nothing is ever done to these pictures except to try to lighten or clarify what is there. And nearly all good sightings are better in motion rather than in still form.) As I always say, it's not about the size here, but the spying of something that we might not supposed to be seeing that is the fun. Then again, some of these guys are fine with showing their stuff. Enough said, now on with the show!

Thanks, by the way, to our cover boy for this post, the athletic screen star Cornel Wilde. Below we see Mr. Wilde again, this time sporting a 1950s mullet (!) and being embraced by Miss Maureen O'Hara in a publicity shot for At Sword's Point (1952.)
A perennial Underworld fave, Mr. Clint Walker from his days on Cheyenne (1955-1963.)
Anthony Perkins persuasively taking a break from a movie (Friendly Persuasion, 1956, perhaps?)
Let's leave it to Tony Dow of Leave it to Beaver (1957-1963.)
Fabian stars in the 1959 film Hound-Dog Man.
Mmmmm... The beefylicious Vince Edwards, taking a swim break from Ben Casey (1961-1966.) (This one could have been categorized in my posts on chests or swimsuits, too!)
Chad Everett, standing beside costar Larry Ward, sports a heavenly pair of trousers in The Dakotas (1963.)
Another one of our faves, Lee Majors during The Big Valley (1965-1969.)
Doug McClure worked on The Virginian from 1962-1971 and often gave good bulge.
Here is a close-up of his face for those who may not be familiar with him.
He helped make many a 90-minute episode more palatable as it went along!
Former Tarzan Denny Miller costarring with Juliet Prowse in the 1965-1966 TV series Mona McCluskey.
Guy Williams acting with some of his Lost in Space (1965-1968) costars.
Here he is once more!
I say if your loincloth has a bulge, you're really doing something right! Ha! This is Ron Ely as Tarzan (1966-1968.)
Why wasn't I a child star, so I could get to pal around with him?
This is one of the cargo ship crewmen to be found in The Lost Continent (1968.)
Here comes someone we probably never associate with bulging britches, Mr. James Mason, in the shoreline set Age of Consent (1969.)
This is probably the film that shares the most skin Mason ever put forth, for better or worse.
It also appears to be the one in which he wore the most revealing pants (without the benefit of underwear, I believe! “James Mason IS Commando”)
Here is an early-'70s shot of Mr. Hugh O'Brian, wearing some crisply clean sportswear and shoes of the era!
The TV-movie The Bravos (1972) has George Peppard in a cavalry uniform, a get-up that often affords some bulge views in this and other movies.
No wonder people liked to call in the cavalry!
Since the pics are somewhat blurry, here is his face in the movie.
David Cassidy, star of The Partridge Family (1970-1974), during a casual moment.
All My Children star Richard Hatch prior to his stints on The Streets of San Francisco (1976-1977) and Battlestar Galactica (1978-1979.)
This is quite a telling pair of jeans on Keith Carradine of Nashville (1975.)
In the Blaxploitation classic Three the Hard Way (1974), we meet Fred Williamson and his stretchy pants (shown with costars Jim Kelly and Jim Brown.)
Isaac Hayes (singer of the theme from Shaft, 1971, and later the voice of Chef on South Park, 1997-2005) lets it all hang out in a TV appearance.
I thought I had posted this photo of Dennis Cole before, but as it turns out, this is a different one! The other had him in shorts instead of flimsy pants.
One of the stars of WKRP in Cincinnati (1978-1982), Gary Sandy, in a snugly-tailored suit.
Not an actor, but quite a celeb in his all-too-short life, John Kennedy Jr. enjoying a stroll on the beach in some very flimsy running shorts.
What do you think of Ryan O'Neal's cutoffs? I'm beginning to get nostalgic for them after this.
Do you know what project or program this collection of gentlemen is from?
Among them you will see (left to right) Tony Musante (in red speedo and pullover shirt), David Ogden Stiers, Ted Bessell (on the ground), Robert Conrad (in some fun shorts), Billy Crystal and Jeff Conaway. This is a publicity photo from the four-hour TV-movie Breaking Up is Hard to Do (1979), which was based on the hit song by Neil Sedaka!

Replacement “Duke Boys” Christopher Mayer and Byron Cherry of The Dukes of Hazzard (1982-1983.)
One of the requirements, apart from needing a brunette and a blonde to take the places of Tom Wopat and John Schneider, appears to have been a mandatory “moose-knuckle” as well!
We always like to toss out a little Gil Gerard whenever possible. Here he is in his skin-tight costume for Buck Rogers in the 25th Century (1979-1981.)
The year before that series, Gerard played a man wrongly convicted of a crime who serves ten years in prison and then has to readjust to outside life in the TV-movie Killing Stone (1978.) In this shot, our eyes have to adjust to those clingy jeans he's got on!
Also in 1978, the world was treated to Robbie Benson in Ice Castles. Sadly, his skating partner in the movie was blind and so couldn't get a look at him in his briefs! (By the way, Benson is now a university professor in Bloomington, Indiana!)
Next we find the costars of Deathtrap (1982), Christopher Reeve and Michael Caine, and their ladies, meeting up together.
General Hospital (1983-1985) star Steve Bond, who also appeared memorably in Playgirl magazine more than once.
Remember the early HBO series The Hitchhiker? Running from 1983-1991, it was an adult-oriented anthology show that featured quite a few up and coming actors and occasional veterans. Here in a 1985 installment, we see Edward Albert in some simultaneously revealing and confusing blue jeans.
That same year, Gregg Henry (remember him from Body Double, 1984, and many other movies and TV shows?) played a lothario who is the victim of revenge from a lady played by Shannon Tweed.
He is seduced into and tied to a bed, then forced to try to free himself before it self-destructs with him in it!
The obscure teen flick Jocks (1986) stars a handsome young man named Scott Strader who wears some eye-pleasing red sweatpants...
...as well as, along with many other guys in the film, short, tight tennis shorts. I'd pay more attention to the sport of tennis today if these sorts of get-ups were the norm instead of those awful baggy, floppy shorts now in fashion.
Now a few more in-depth investigations. First, we have Mr. Lloyd Bridges, who we've long admired on the front of classic comic book covers for his series Sea Hunt (1958-1961), but who has engendered even more appreciation after witnessing him in action on the show!
On dry land, his white trousers sometimes allowed for some ogling...
...but it was his li'l white trunks that were the most fun.
There simply aren't enough (or any?) network TV series like this any more which will show us extended views of the male star, barely clothed and in action.
Watch now as he apparently shows more than he or anyone else bargained for in this series of shots!
Jesus take the wheel! Is that Lloyd Jr. popping out to say hello?
Now, we take a look at Michael Sarrazin in the 1973 movie Harry in Your Pocket, all about a small troupe of pickpockets.
Sarrazin seems to have something hairy in his pocket, too!
His lightweight suits tend to reveal a lot.
At times in the movie, his pants take center stage over the wallet-snatching action of the film.
Some shots leave precious little to the imagination.
My recent tribute to Matt Houston (1982-1985) touched on the crotchetic charms of the beautiful Lee Horsley.
Almost any given episode lends itself to a peek.
Some more than others...
..and some even more than that!
In this photo montage, he and guest star David Cassidy had a phallic face-off.
This picture is not of Horsley but of a guest star who's caught up in a fitness contraption. Can you guess the unlikely actor? This isn't much to go on, admittedly. I don't know if you'd gopher him or not.
Yep, that was Fred “Gopher Smith” Grandy, better known for his long run on The Love Boat (1977-1986.)
Star Trek fans know Gary Lockwood as a featured guest star in one of the pilots (1966), though he is also known for 2001: A Space Odyssey (1969) and other movies and TV shows. In 1974, he guest-starred on The Six-Million Dollar Man as an assassin stalking the star of the show, Lee Majors.
As he crosses a street and fastens his suit jacket, we get a more than eye-popping glimpse of his private parts.
He seems to be wearing nothing at all under his dress suit to the point where we pretty much know what Stefanie Powers woke up to every day during their 1966-1974 marriage!
I don't think Rodan could have sculpted anything more explicit.
Finally, we take a look at one of the big guns. John Ireland (seen here in 1954's Southwest Passage with his then-wife Joanne Dru) is legend among the well-hung Hollywood stars of old.
As Bette Davis once remarked on the subject, “Why is it always the homely ones?”... though her “pal” Joan Crawford didn't mind, carrying on affairs with Ireland on several occasions.
Just look at this still photo from a fight scene with Lawrence Tierney in The Bushwhackers (1951.) I'd say he had one!
Well, even though that's a tough act to follow, I decided to leave you with two more. The (undisputed as far as I am concerned) King of the TV Cowboy Crotcheroos, John Smith of Laramie (1959-1963) is up first. Any time I watch that show, it is with a slack jaw (and one of these days I AM going to write about it! I somehow keep failing to do so.) It's hard to believe that this publicity shot made its way out into the world, but it did!
And lastly, I give you once more the ex-pro football player-turned-actor and sportscaster, Fred Williamson. You know, Fred posed for Playgirl in semi-nude shots that weren't nearly as revealing as this casual, ostensibly benign snap taken at his home in the trophy room. God love the '70s... Nicknamed "The Hammer" for his tough plays on the field, I think it could very well apply to more than one aspect of his person!

12 comments:

normadesmond said...

takes a lot of balls to do a post like this.

Kelly Wittmann said...

That phone scene in "Ice Castles"... I walked around in a daze for weeks after seeing it.

Knuckles Girlyskirt said...

Gil Gerard, always worth my drool!!!

As for James Mason, I never really viewed him as a hottie...but when compared to that yuck-inducing shot of David Cassidy, I would gladly accept him with open arms.

My apologies to any D.C. fans out there...but he's really out of his league here!!!!

timerwolf700 said...

Why don't you include actor John Hart somewhere on your site. He wears some pretty skimpy shorts in an episode of I Love Lucy "The Hedda Hopper Story."

Sansacro said...

Lee Horsley and Bob Conrad--Damn. They will always remain ideals for me.

lovpeppard said...

Thanks for showing George Peppard! And thanks for making me not be the only one who bulge-watches! Wish I could send you some really great ones of George, also other celebs! Used to do locations shoots, and also Battle of Network Stars and celeb basketball games, when the shorts were SHORT, the water was wet, and the view was *fiiiine*!
Uh-huh!

Douglas said...

I just came across the show Laramie and have to agree with you on how did those shots of Jon Smith get by the censors. in almost every scene, there is a very, very noticeable bulge on the left side. The pants leave nothing to the imagination. In some scenes, you can see that he is uncut. Robert Fuller comes in a very close 2nd. If you notice, they both wear the same tight pants in every episode: Smith tan and Fuller light blue.

Poseidon3 said...

lovpeppard, I don't know where the hell I've been that I missed your comment from a year ago (!), but I do have a site mailbox (Poseidonmail@yahoo.com) if you ever wish to send me pics. Thank you!

Douglas, I have season one of Laramine on DVD and keep threatening to do a tribute to it, but never get around to it. I agree that it is staggering!!

bob said...

I really think you should check out Sam Elliot in the movie Frogs. How they got away with showing his packet in those tight jeans is baffling, but oh my! It almost takes your eye out.

Poseidon3 said...

Bob, http://neptsdepths.blogspot.com/2010/01/some-of-sam.html

billysscreeningroom2 said...

Parker Stevenson in "Lifeguard".

Unknown said...

I watch Laramie any time I can..it airs here M-F.
My friend and I call it "The Bulging Western" and that's because "In The Old West..The Outlaws Were Hung"!!